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Finding Love


The art of finding love can be one filled with extreme highs and lows. At times it can be draining and exhausting, yet in the end fulfilling. When and, in the end, when we find our one through many dates, meet-ups, or online secret encounters through different forms of social media or blind dates. Most friendships and relationships now begin online, without really knowing the true essence of another’s personality, lifestyle, or background. One too many times, we enter blindly into the possibility of investing our time, hoping to find a long-lasting partner that will culminate in a fairytale ending. Of course, this has been force-fed to most when we started reading our first fairytale story at the age of five. Who doesn’t remember watching the dreaded long-running Spanish soap opera or dreaded chic flicks? I remembered my mom on occasions sitting me down to watch Spanish soap operas. As she too was waiting for her own version of Prince Charming. Not aware her expectations would be the ones I would set my own standards for future relationships. All Spanish soaps had the same plot twist, the suffering miserable maid longing for her rich prince. Through a series of pitfalls, the prince rescues his maid, turning her into a queen. It’s the same concept as a princess finding her frog and giving him the preverbal kiss turning him into her prince charming, regardless of warts.

The one common denominator which connects us all is, we are all looking for that one of a kind perfect love. The love that is meant to withstand a lifetime. However, the one thing I have learned is to find that kind of love or that perfect match; we need to first and before all love ourselves. May sound cliché, but it stands true. We must completely love ourselves on every level, and while sometimes it is not always an easy task. Understand life is far from perfect. But, if we go deep within our own inner selves, we can find perfection in the imperfect and learn to embrace our flaws. You see, love may not be an emotion, after all, I once overheard Sarah Jakes Roberts say that love is something we radiate. Maybe there is some truth to that. Is it not true that the law of attraction says we attract our destiny by our actions? Then we can do the same by loving ourselves? I’m not pretending it is an easy fix. However, I have woken up given myself the proverbial pep talk and noticed with a smile and a gleam in my eye, I have attracted positive things throughout the day. Whether it be a kind gesture, a smile, or wanton attention of a handsome gentleman. I mean, hey, maybe your fairy tale ending is not so far off into the future.

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